Day 3 - Its already a wash!

I've decided that perhaps I'm bulimic and just keep forgetting to purge. 

~Paula Poundstone

Today I woke up feeling terrible. the headache behind my right eye hates me and is refusing to leave. Addie fell and hit her head last night and has a enormous bump on her head. And Logan had a diaper blowout at 6:00 am. So I reacted by eating all of this junk:

• 1 glass of iced tea
• a half of a bowl of fruity pebbles
• a medium coke
• a 4 count Chicken minis
• 2 pieces of Dove chocolate

I am pretty sure that my end of week weight will be around 157. I didnt have time to pack my shakes so I am going to try to redeem myself by having a salad for lunch and a shake for dinner. I once read that it takes 2 days to creat a habit and a week to break it. God I sure hope not because I am on day 2 of bad eating!!!!!!!

Day 2 - Lunch

I was craving Pizza so I decided to make lunch my meal. Then I added alot of italian cookies and ruined the whole day!

Day 2 - Dinner

I forgot to take a picture of dinner last night since I was runnign around like mad getting the kids fed and in bed. Even though I shouldnt have this is what I had:

• 1/2 of a ham steak
• a heap of mashed potatoes smothered in my mom's raisin gravy
• 2 scoops of corn

Teh downward spiral began there and ended 2 Dove milk chocolate bars later.

GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR why cant I beat this weight!!!

Day 2 - Morning Snack

Todays afternoon snzack is a big glass of my Herbalife tea mixed with a little raspberry lemonade crystal light. I also have a pepper jack cheese square that I am now hooked on thanks to one Claire Miller!

Day 2 - Breakfast

Don't dig your grave with your own knife and fork. 

 ~English Proverb

Breakfast has always been my worst meal. I swear that I dream about banana pancakes, sausage, and hot coffee! So when I wake up in the moving I am typically more hungry than I have ever been.

I have tried giving up my morning coffee. But the reality is- I NEED IT! For example, here was my schedule yesterday:

6:00 am wake up with Logan; change and dress him

6:45 am get in the shower and get ready for work

7:30 am wake up Addie; change and dress her

7:45 am leave to go pick up mom

8:05 am get back to the house; pack lunch for the day

8:20 am leave for work

6:20 pm get home from work

6:30 pm head to pick up dinner and drop off mom

7:15 pm get home to feed the kids, play, and get them to bed

9:00 pm start homework

11:15 pm hit the bed!!!

And this morning Logan got up at 3:00 am to eat and 6:00 am for good! I NEED COFFEE!!

My inspiration

I want to be live an long and happy life with these two rotten eggs!!!!

Day 1 - Guilty Pleasure

                      Need I say more??????

Day 1- dinner

I'm really proud of myself today.

Dinner complements of Richardson farm!

Day 1 - evening snack

Yummy!

Day 1- Afternoon Snack

Thank God it's 3:00 pm!!

Day 1- Lunch

I’ve been on a diet for two weeks and all I’ve lost is two weeks.
~Totie Fields~

The time is now 1:00 pm and I am starving! I considered eating my yummy salad that I packed along with drinking my shake. I consulted my workplace support (thanks Claire!) and she said I should drink my shake at 1:00 and have my salad at 3:00. So that is what I shall do! 

Today's lunch shake is vanilla blondie with a side of alot of vitamins and supplements!

The beginning...

I am a very routine person. I wake up at the same time; take a shower at the same time; leave my house at the same time. I consider my self to be a very aware person. But one morning I woke up and noticed something was different. I looked at myself in the mirror and thought "how in the hell did I get to this point?".

From the time that I was 16 years old I have weighed 130 pounds. Ok, it is true that that was 11 years ago. And it is true that I have had 2 children in 2 years (you read that correctly- 1 in 2010 and 1 in 2011). It is also true that I work 40 hours a week, take at least 2 college courses, run a household, and manage all of the household financials. So most people are probably thinking that with all of that going on I should be 1000 pounds! In reality I weigh more today than I have ever weighed (not including pregnancy). Sadly enough I am only 8 lbs away from what my max pregnancy weight was. I used to be able to eat anything that I wanted and never gain a pound. Now it seems I gain 2 pounds for every bite I take.

I realized today that I have let myself go in so many ways-not just my weight. I am hoping that the lower my weight goes the higher my self esteem will fly. After all, my princess is going to look to me as a model of what a woman, and more importantly a mother, should be. And my little man is going to look to as a model of what he should look for in a wife. And my husband deserves to have the woman he married back (both mentally and physically).

My starting weight on this journey is 155 pounds. My ending weight on this journey will be 130 pounds. I will not give up until I wake up and look in that mirror and say "damn you are a hot momma!"